"Pills, Bills, & Parkinson's Disease"
Coping with the On-Off Syndrome

I was a relatively young 53 years old when I was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease in February 1992. My initial symptoms included numbness in my hands and legs, a moderate limp, general form of body rigidity, and highly illegible hand writing. My original thought was I wanted to rid myself of these conditions to improve my golf game. As a general optimist, I never envisioned that I suffered from a permanently degenerative situation. It was quite a shock for me, after a physical exam and an MRI of my brain, to

hear my neurologist, Dr. Melvin Vigman, officially label me as a Parkinsonian. Suddenly, I felt a lot older than 53 as I compared myself with the older residents of my in-laws’ nursing home. I too was destined to be a zombie-like creature.

At the time I was diagnosed with PD, I had a good job with Dean Witter, and I held a prestigious position in Lafayette College as the chairman of the school’s athletic Hall of Fame. Also, had been the guest speaker at the Keene Savings Bank economic seminar every year since its inception in 1984. I played golf regularly with friends and clients and enjoyed a membership at Essex County Country Club. My concern was that soon I would have to phase out a lot of my activities as my PD intensified. I enjoyed the activities of my daughters Alison and Priscilla as they busily lived the lives of b suburban New Jersey teenagers. My wife and I enjoyed touring the Caribbean Islands, Mexico, and Europe. In short, I had a lot going for myself and my family. I had no doubt that my lifestyle would have to change due to the limiting factors of Parkinson’s disease.

For the first seven years that I lived knowing I was a Parkinson’s victim, I tried to keep my condition a secret on most fronts. But as my symptoms intensified, it became increasingly difficult to execute business transactions in a prompt and efficient manner. I chose early retirement from Morgan Stanley in 1999. Gradually, I became nervous about my roles as a public speaker at the Hall of Fame ceremony and the Keene Seminar, and I resigned from both positions. After almost 30 years as a member, I quit the Essex County Country Club as the course became too difficult for me.

A major blow to my independence occurred when I was no longer allowed to drive an automobile. I found that I could fall asleep at the wheel without any warning, at anytime day or night. I came within an eyelash of a near fatal accident when I awakened to find myself traveling in the wrong direction, almost on the opposite shoulder, of a major connecting artery between Short Hills and Chatham, New Jersey.

Fortunately, as most of my physical activities became affected by PD, I maintained a fairly strong speed on the word processor and I started to actively write stories about many subjects. My alma mater Lafayette had recently shocked the college basketball world with a victory over highly ranked Notre Dame, and I went into great detail while writing up this game. Before I knew it, I had 40 pages written, and I realized I could possibly write the biography of the fascinating man who coached LC at the time, Butch van Breda Kolff.

The book led to the creation of PAL Publishing, my own self-publishing book company. Eventually, I would publish approximately 2,400 copies of four titles in about five years. PAL Publishing was the perfect conduit for adapting to my Parkinson’s condition. I could write and publish at my own speed, without any pressures from upper management. I hired four talented interns from Lafayette and conscripted some personal friends (affectionately referred to as the "Chatham Men’s Club") to handle assignments such as mailing, proofreading, and distribution. As president of PAL Publishing, I felt I regained some self-respect and restored my contact with the outside world. PAL Publishing became my raison d'être, and the image of myself as a zombie faded from my mind.

The aging process obviously affects us all. None of us checks out of here alive! Hopefully, reading this book will enable you to tolerate the ravages of PD a little more than you might otherwise. I am sure your friends and family want you to hang around a bit longer.